The Shoot Club (Houston)

[Stoner]

Ok, I'd like to bring in Joel Rocker's agent.  According to the stat sheet its JZ, who I believe is Jerzey but I've been wrong before.  And if its not overstepping my bounds, could you order me a new electric stove for my office?  The one I have in here only lets me cook a single pancake at a time, which isn't going to be a nice way to greet my guests.  Please and thank you?

[Mike Powers]

Pancakes, you're a strange cat. 



*****










Wats good playa'? Hit me wit a deal yo, and don't insult us!

[Stoner]

Well, I know I want to make Joel a member of the team here for the long run.  I've heard he's at the top of his game and that is something I could get behind.  But I'd also like to make sure I could build around him on the team, to put him with a group of guys that would really be able to do some good work.

So as I sat here eating my daily Belgian Waffle with CoolWhip and strawberries, a very underrated meal I should add, an idea came to me.  And I think its one you'll like.

So I want to propose this to you.  I'd be willing to pay him a flat 9 million, OR, 8 million with 2 million from the PR budget.  Either way I'd like him here for 4 years.

[Mike Powers]

Lookie here playa, remember where I said don't insult us my man?  The 3rd pick signed for $8.5 mil and $1.5 mil PR.  Joel is the Number One overall pick dawg, and he needs ta get paid like it.  We want 4 years, $10 mil, and $2.5 mil in PR. 

[Stoner]

So I'm being punished because other people don't know the correct way to spend money?  I guess.  I'll confirm it as soon as I finish this breakfast.

[Mike Powers]

Nah dawg, you is bein' "punished" 'cause instead of calling me right up afta you drafted my man so that YOU could be the one to set the market, you sat up here strokin' ya self wit maple syrup, ya feel me playa'?  You is late to the party, you gots to pay the penalty.

[Stoner]

Right.  Well, I just hope he's worth the money in any case.  I'm sure he will be though.

While you're here, your client Sam Barton?  6 Million for 3 years?  This seems comparable to the going rates of people being drafted in the second round so far.

[Mike Powers]

Yeah dawg, we'll sign fo dat.

[Stoner]

Thank you, I appreciate you working with me.  There are a few other people you represent I have my eye on currently, so I'll likely be in touch with you in the future.  If you have a particular flavor of syrup  or breakfast pastry you enjoy, leave a note for me and I'll make sure we have some in stock next time you're here.

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Ms Davis, could you get Emilio Ruiz here for me?  I'd like to discuss signing Jamie Hampton to a deal.

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Mr. Ruiz, I know Ms. Hampton was technically signed in the 3rd round, but as I drafted them at the same time I'd like to offer her the same deal I offered my second round pick.  3 years, 6 million.  Is that acceptable?

[Mike Powers]

Allow me to say.....THAT THAT IS AN INCREDIBLE OFFER!!!!  My client gladly accepts.  WOO HOO!!!   

[Stoner]

Good deal.  We've got it all taken care of.  I'm sure we'll speak again in the future.

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Ms Davis, I need you to get a hold of Melissa Soliz on behalf of Rick Turner for me.  In the mean time are you hungry or anything?  There is plenty of batter here if you feel like you need a snack or something.  And if we don't have your brand of syrup on hand I'm sure we can order it.  I just don't want you feeling like you're little more than a phone call machine.

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Ms Soliz.  I'd like to offer Mr Turner 5 million for 3 years.  Is this acceptable?

[Mike Powers]

You pronounce my name weird.  Don't do that again honey.  As for Rick, we'll take that deal any day of the week.   

[Stoner]

Wow.  My mistake, I guess having lived in this portion of Texas for as long as I have my brain auto-corrected the "s" in your name to a "z".  And we all know that auto-correct is right about as often as a Denny's server thinking that "chocolate chip pancakes" means regular pancakes with a side of chocolate chips.  Losers.

Anyway I'm glad we came to that agreement easily.  I'll be seeing you around.

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Ms Davis, I'd like you to bring in Benjamin Lancaster.  He represents Bradley.

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Mr. Lancaster, I'd like to offer Bradley the same deal I've given the man who would be his tag partner, Rick Turner.  3 years, 5 million dollars. 

[Mike Powers]

Done.   

[Stoner]

Thank you Mr Lancaster.  I always enjoy when these meetings go smooth as maple syrup.

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Ms Davis, I need you to get Ms Solis in here again.

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Ms Solis.  I drafted Rob Washington in the 6th round.  I'd like to give him 4 million for 3 years.  Is this acceptable?