Your greatest drunken exploit

[Adam Wrong]

I got a mankini for my birthday from my flatmates last night. We had a few to drink, I put it on and ordered a takeaway. When it arrived the delivery driver's face was an absolute picture. Especially when I pulled the money from the crotch then bent over to pick up the bottle of coke...

I also have got drunk climbed into a bath fully vclothed and fallen asleep

I have also been warned by bouncers for camp dancing.

I woke up outside the hospital where I would be working in a few years time covered in vomit and 4 hours away from an A level exam

I woke up half naked next to somebody I did not know on the beach

And finally of the ones I wish to post here...

I had relations with somebody who may have been a lil too young for me on her parents living room floor but didn't find out her age until a few weeks later...

Tonight I intend to add to those exploits

[Doug E Fresh]

During my co bachelor/bachelorette party, got smashed and told my wife's entire bridal party they were cunts for not wanting to stay at the strip club.

I was there that was funny lol.

[Joey WARPED]

There were a few of us going out. The night began with pre-drinks. I don't remember what we had, but it was maybe 2-3 strong (yet tasty) mixed drinks and a couple shots.

We drove to a club and I had something to drink there that I can't remember, but it was good! Just one drink.

From there we went to a bar in which I had a 7up and something, the drink turned blue.. uh.. anyway, then a Dirty Martini! Now at this point I was pretty messed up from the pre-drinking and previous stuff...and a dirty martini is heeeeeeavvvvvyy...

I have a problem blacking out once I hit the fresh air outside after drinking excessively. Its only happened a few times, but its not fun. So, I don't remember much of being in the car, only a little bit, as we drove to another location. Apparently I was rowdy and loud there, and had some wine! It was a wine bar!

So then we get to our final destination, a club, in which when I arrive I am very loud and screaming inside of where they check your ID, a small little room before the club...and well they said I couldn't get in.

Both friends help me out, one on each side, but as we get outside someone says 'you should be taking pictures' to one of the friends, so they let go and begin snapping 'em up! From there, the other friend (keep in mind, he's around 6 foot and I'm 5'3") he's got me in the full nelson, kicking my feet to help me walk. He's also quite drunk, but not nearly as much as me.

So I stumble, hit my elbow, maybe a lil crash and scratches, no biggy. I then go down again and he, the very tall person, goes down with me and he shields my face while HE goes face first into the gravel and rocks.

There was a lot of blood I'm told.

His eyebrow got fuckkkked up. He had pebbles stuck in it in the morning. His ear also had scratches and stuff. His eye was swolen shut from it.

I woke up the next morning and was like 'ohh my back button is missing on my phone' then saw him and I was like 'what happened?!?!' and he was like YOU lol ... he joked  about it thankfully and wasn't too angry. Soo.. we're still friends. Never again...

Oh, that morning, I helped hold him down while the other friend poored peroxide over his wounds.

There are photos of me and my nonsense night. There is video of him the next morning. OH, there is also AUDIO of my drunken screams and rants right before I would drop the phone (losing my back button) and the audio cut. I had called into my buddy's radio show and was live up on that shit when I was a drunken rage. Its great.

That's one of my stories.

[Drama Queen]

I dressed in my boxers, a cape and borrowed stockings and suspenders (and I already had eyeliner on from visiting the alternative nightclub the "Slimelight" earlier in the evening) and went down the elevator into a packed hotel lobby and performed "Sweet Transvestite" from the Rocky Horror.

As cliched as it sounds a bunch of asian tourists were going crazy taking pictures of the performance. The receptionist was about to call for security until I wagged my finger at her and told her "don't get strung out... by the way I look... don't judge a book by it's cover".... then she just doubled over and almost pissed herself laughing.

I made it through the first verse and chorus, took a bow,received massive applause, then sprinted back up the elevator and to my room.

[Gary]

I have two...which I dont remember that well..but its the day after scenario that wins.

2003, I went to Culebra (Snake) Island off the eastern coast of PR for spring break..we took massive ammounts of licor for the weekend (around 500.00 US dollars worth) the last day, we still had a lot left but we couldnt bring it back on the ferry with us so we decided to mix it all up.. rum, vodka, scotch into one container, with all the juices and mixers. We took the first sip and it actually tasted good so we kept drinking till there was none left, but for some weird reason I didnt feel drunk, just tired. I went to the villa, ate something and then went out the door..after that i don't remember anything that happened till I woke up the day after, only in jeans, no glasses, no shirt, no shoes, in the balcony of a 4 story building that i had to do a long ass walk to get too.

2005, 5th of july i was at a boat party (lots of boats gathered in one place), for the past 3 days i had been drinking since 8 am that day only rum with parcha juice, around 4 oclock i went into the boat i was staying at went to look for a cigarette closed my eyes and then when i opened them it was the next day, and I was in my own bed at my house (which is around a 1 hour boat ride to the dock, then 1 hour drive home) how I got from the water to my house is still a mystery.

[chunkylover]

I had relations with somebody who may have been a lil too young for me on her parents living room floor but didn't find out her age until a few weeks later...

That's funny, I was talking to Russ about his greatest drunken exploit and it was having sex on his parents living room floor with a girly twentysomething man...